I had nothing to offer anybody except my own confusion.
"Dirty Fingernails" by Modest Mouse
it took me years to condition myself to thinking i could not to be this easily fettered, but years are ultimately so, so short.
and i think it dawned on me yesterday night that a lifetime might not even enough to unlearn what i know, to re-do my habits. and that’s a hard pill to fuckin swallow, but a very, very real one that you can feel sliding down your throat and dropping into the pit of small, tired being. and you then you know, and you understand.